If there’s one thing I’m slowly figuring out in life it’s this: I’m an idiot.
I don’t want you to be a dummy like I am — which is why I feel obligated to share this piece of information.
I didn’t have a real understanding of what you’re about to read until recently, and I know it’s still an incomplete understanding. For some reason it took reading my favorite book “The Way of The Superior Man” 5+ times to have it ‘hit me’ and go from being merely information, to real knowledge (you know, the shit that actually matter).
Hopefully that happens more quickly for you.
This may be one of the most important things you could ever know about women. Once you ‘see it,’ you really see it. The matrix opens up.
Trust me, read the following.
“Men grow by challenge. As a boy, other boys would challenge you in order to inspire you: “I bet you can’t jump over that fence.” In a place like boot camp, you are told you are a worthless slimedog, and this kind of insult challenges you to be your best.
So, as a man, you probably have a masculine habit of challenging people, including your woman, in order to get her to improve or grow.
Only the masculine side of your woman will grow through challenge. The feminine side thrives on support and praise. Telling her, “I love the shape of your body,” will be much greater incentive for her to exercise than telling her, “I hope you don’t gain any more weight.”
Praise always magnifies the quality of your woman that you praise. “You’re so beautiful when you smile,” is much more effective than, “You’re so ugly when you frown,” although they both indicate your desire for her smile. When speaking to your woman, it is always better to call the glass half full than half empty.
Praise is literal food for feminine qualities. If you want your woman to grow in her radiance, health, happiness, love, beauty, power, and depth, praise these qualities. Praise them daily, a number of times.
It is a difficult practice for most men to learn, but you must learn to praise the very qualities you feel are not yet praiseworthy in order for them to become so. In other words, praise the tiny quality that you want to grow. If you know that your woman would be healthier if she exercised more, don’t tell her that. It will feel like an insult to her, a rejection of her the way she is. Instead, tell her how sexy she is when she sweats in her leotards. Tell her how much it turns you on when she moves her body. Whatever parts of her body you really like, let her know, frequently.
Praising the things you really enjoy when she exercises will magnify her exercising. On the other hand, by telling her why she should exercise, you are indicating that she is not acceptable to you the way she is. Praise works. Information doesn’t. Praise motivates. Challenge doesn’t. Try it. Praise specific things you love about your woman 5-10 times a day. Find out what happens.”David Deida
Do yourself a favor and pick up the full book. Do it.